So to the restoration: soak the frame mudguards etc in penetrating oil, WD40, & a dash of olive oil & leave to marinade for a month!
After ooh about two days am bored & impatient so begin to disassemble, for the most part fasteners come off reasonably easy, the recalcitrant ones are introduced to Mr. Blowtorch & Mrs. Hacksaw or just winding it up till the head snaps off, this method works with the wife as well!
Wife is impressed with my ability to reduce a pile of rust into ever smaller component parts, my son suspects they are reproducing in the box when no one is looking, my daughter thinks I've lost the plot !
Considering it was last on the road in 1971 it's pretty much all there & for the most part salvageable so a quick degrease of cycle parts & first stop a certain metal polisher who shall remain nameless to get the chromed parts polished & chromed.
"Yeah we can do that It'll be a couple of weeks mate!" (It is now October)
Two weeks pass & am getting excited to prove to wife it can be made "shiny" again so call polisher
"err who, oh yeah mate, bit busy, be a couple of weeks yet"
Anyway Christmas comes & goes & it's still nearly done, just another couple of weeks mate!
February now & will be ready for collection on Friday mate. Yippee!
Call on Friday before setting off to collect
"Hello I'm coming to pick up my stuff, is it ready?"
"Dunno mate I'm only watching the workshop he's gone on holiday"
How long will he be on frigging holiday?
"Couple of weeks mate!!"
At this rate the only thing I'll be riding is a mobility scooter!
And so it went on.
Why do people nowadays say two weeks, when what they really mean is two years if you're lucky & I can be bothered?
Anyway no conrods with engine so buy complete engine on fleabay for the same price as the only pair of secondhand rods I could source.
Engine actually OK, crank & mains need grinding ,sludge trap cleaning etc. Bores/pistons @ +20 with light scoring so decide to fit new rings & see if it smokes!
Camshaft shot & anyone with a longstroke motor knows they are rarer than hens teeth.
Eventually strike a deal to have two made up, bit cheaper that way, per piece & since they don't run in an oil trough figure I may get to use the other one sooner than later!
So no it's not for sale just yet.
Wife didn't buy that logic! "Why are you buying two if it only needs one? " Women!
After much procrastination Crank & cases go off to SRM for quote.
May have to sell one of the kids on Ebay.
Quote comes back, wife faints!
Quick phone call
Me: "I just want the crank journal & big ends ground, fit new bush & jig bore"
Technician: "We have to dynamically crack test the crank with thermonuclear Kryptonite sir"
Me: Why?
Technician: Well there's no point grinding it if it's cracked.
Me: So if it's cracked where do I get a new one?
Technician: You can't
Me: So if it's cracked I'm stuffed & still have to pay for the kryptonite ?
Technician: Yep
Me: I don't want it crack tested thank you?
Technician: well we can do it the old fashioned way for free but we can't guarantee the work then.
Me: That's fine, what is the old fashioned way then?
Technician: We hit it with a hammer!
Me: Sounds good to me, go for it.
There was also quite a bit of alloy welding work to do, but a quick call to the local blacksmith ascertains he'll do it for 20 B&H, my kind of currency!
His assistant also resurrected very holey bent mudguards in his lunch hours for little more.
So having got quote down to affordable level & safe in the knowledge I get to keep the kids, I bite the bullet & book it in.
"How long will it take?" I whisper reaching for the Valium.
"Six weeks sir".
Six weeks to the day I get a call from SRM telling me all done, so kudos to them.
In the meantime frame & cycle parts are back all shiny & stoved.
Wife likes shiny, so looks like marriage will survive as long as she doesn't see the credit card statements!
To be continued.............................................
